So far my handful of posts have had to do with what I’m reading, have read, and will read.  One post introduced you to my writing venture with Rachel (you can find said venture by click on A Saucy Title).  This time, however, I want to write about something near and dear to my heart.  Something I deal with on a daily basis and that, sadly, I spend much time thinking about.  And that, ladies and gentlemen, is office politics.


I believe I mentioned before that I work in a publishing firm on the east coast.  That means I work in an office.  And not one of the glamorous ones in New York or Boston portrayed in such films as The Devil Wears Prada and Confessions of a Shopaholic.  No, I work in a mid-sized office in the suburbs of an east coast state to remain unnamed.  But it doesn’t matter where I work or the dynamics of the office because every office deals with office politics.  Hence why The Office and Office Space are so popular.  Just yesterday at lunch someone brought up how they can’t find their stapler and we spent about 5 minutes discussing other items stolen.  That’s right, we discussed staplers.  Milton was there in spirit.  My office politics discussion today doesn’t have to do with staplers though.  It has to do with milk.  Milk.  I said it.  Milk.


My office provides milk.  First office I have ever been in, and possibly ever heard of, that provides milk.  Before my office moved locations two months ago we had milk delivered by a service.  Every week gallons and half-gallons of milk products would show up and replace the unfinished gallons and half-gallons of milk products from the previous week.  We dumped out enough milk to hydrate America.


When we moved we learned there isn’t a service that delivers the small amount of milk we order each week.  But don’t fear my dear readers, for a woman who does too much in the office already is our new milk delivery service.  Every week she purchases milk for the office, brings it in, and expenses it.  And why?  Because the office would erupt like a dragon in heat if there wasn’t milk.  Each week this woman goes out and buys a gallon of whole milk and a half-gallon each of skim, 2%, and half-and-half.  She volunteered for this job before anyone even found out the horrific news that there is no service available.  And how do I know all of this?  Because I was the one who researched delivery services.  That’s right people, a master’s degree in English and I’m research milk delivery services.  But don’t let my sarcasm mislead you for I volunteered for the project.  Why?  Because I had nothing else to do.  This woman knew, before it was even a possibility, what would happen if the people in this office did not get their milk.  And she was proven right the week I went on vacation.


Apparently in my absence, though not even related to my absence, the office was without milk.  Our new “delivery woman” forgot to get the milk and was out for a day or two.  People didn’t know what to do.  They were in a fury.  One walked the two minute walk to the cafeteria in our complex to, gasp!, buy milk!  And she is still talking about it to this day.  Another sent an email to the absent “delivery woman” as if she could, or would, take care of it while she was gone.  Or would even make it top priority upon her return.


Crazy, you might say.  And I would have to agree.  Although I have to admit that I am without words appreciative of the milk and an avid user for I am a milk lover.  But I think I could survive if it wasn’t provided for me.  I survived at all my other jobs.  These other people, I’m not so sure about.  One could ask, if they want the milk so bad why don’t they buy it?  Why isn’t there a rotation system for being responsible for that week’s milk purchase?  Why aren’t one of the managers in charge of this?  Why is a woman who has been told she can’t go any further in this company and takes on more responsibility than anyone else now responsible for getting milk?  Most importantly though, why should anyone be wasting their time wondering about milk in an office?


Milk.  All of this over milk.


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